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Want more? Mike Pingree also writes a separate Looking Glass column for the Boston Herald. Past Columns (The Archives)
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February 11, 2001 EXCUSE ME, TERRIBLY SORRY, AHHHH! A 22-year-old man became so
heavily intoxicated in a crowded beer tent at the Oktoberfest in Munich,
Germany, that he urinated on the leg of a woman. He told a court that he
suddenly "felt an urgent need to relieve himself" and had
tried to accomplish this "in an inconspicuous way." He said,
"I didn't mean to hit anyone." HE NEEDS TO HAVE A BUDGET: Ibrahim Elwahsh, a New Jersey man,
earned an annual salary of $25,000, and yet managed to run up a debt of
$450,000 in one year. His secret: an over-enthusiastic use of 20 credit
cards, prosecutors said. When the sea of red ink threatened to engulf
him, he tried to pay it off with bad checks. When this ailed, he
declared bankruptcy. That didn't work either. CAN'T YOU DO ANYTHING RIGHT? A 37-year-old Dutchman, intent on
suicide, jumped off a bridge in the Netherlands and into the freezing
water below, but the impact didn't kill him. So he swam to the riverbank
and went back up to the bridge and jumped again. And again he survived.
So he tried it a third time. Alas, still no luck. BUT, MEDICINE IS MY LIFE! Gary Stearley, a drifter who has a
"fascination" with medicine, posed as "Dr. Joshua
Caldwell" at St. Vincent's Medical Center in Jacksonville, Fla.,
for several days last year until he fled when authorities became
suspicious. A few months later, he was arrested in Pennsylvania posing
as a physician's assistant trainee. NOT POISON? BOY, AM I EMBARRASSED: Darrell K. Walker and his
old pal Joshua Slack were smoking marijuana in a motel room in
Jeffersonville, Ind., when Darrell K. took a swig of soda which tasted
strange to him. He immediately concluded that Slack had poisoned him,
and so, police said, shot him in the head.
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