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June 19, 2005

THE MOST IMPORTANT MEAL OF THE DAY: An ice cream truck driver in Waukesha, Wis., was arrested for drunken driving. A woman called the cops when she saw him throw a can of malt liquor onto her front lawn. When the police stopped him, he first denied drinking but then admitted that he had a beer for breakfast.

CLICK, KA-BOOOOOOM! A man in Hamden, Conn., got up at 2 a.m. to answer nature's call, not realizing that a silent natural gas leak was under way as the result of an excavation on his street. He flipped on the bathroom light and the house exploded. Miraculously, none of the five people who live there were seriously injured.

LIE ON THE FLOOR, EH? WHAM! SMACK! BOP! After robbing a beauty school in Shreveport, La., and terrorizing the eight female students, an armed desperado made for the door, but was tripped up by the manager and fell and dropped his gun.
A male employee jumped on him, and then the bandit was immediately set upon by the female students who he had ordered to lie on the floor. They pummeled him repeatedly with curling irons, chairs and a wooden table leg.
He will be jailed when he gets out of the hospital.

DOING? US? WHAT DO YOU MEAN? Three men have been stealing gasoline from Florida gas station's underground tanks in broad daylight under the noses of attendants. The thieves would park a specially designed truck above above the storage tank, open the lid and suck out the gas with a hose. They have been arrested.

YOU CAN GO BACK IN, BUT BE CAREFUL: All the people who lived in a resident's home in Fitchburg, Mass., were removed to other quarters after the building was damaged by a basement fire and deemed uninhabitable.
Two days later, one lady was allowed to return to retrieve some of her belongings. While inside, she tossed her cigarette into a trash barrel in her kitchen, causing an even worse two-alarm fire.

Mike Pingree writes another Looking Glass column in the Boston Sunday Herald. You can read it by clicking here:
http://www.bostonherald.com/columnists

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