Home

Other Archives

E-Mail
Mike Pingree

Past Columns (Jan - Mar, 2005)

March 27,  2005

THAT LITTLE DEVIL JUST KEPT COMING ... PAY PHONES? REALLY? I'M AS SURPRISED AS YOU ... AND MAKE IT IN SMALL, UNMARKED BILLS ... OH, NEVER MIND ... IS IT WARM IN HERE OR IS IT ME? OH

March 20,  2005

BETTER THAN "OH GAWWWWD YESSS, YESSSS, YESSS, AHHHH!'' ... OK, IS THAT EVERYBODY? ... RULE 34: WHEN YOU HEAR NOISES UNDER THE CAR, STOP ... THE BLIND LEADING THE BLIND ... GOOD, IF YOU LIKE WEAVING

March 13,  2005

WE'LL PULL IT OUT JUST FOR YOU ... AND THEY ALSO CUT HAIR WELL ... JUSTICE MUST PREVAIL, APPLE LADY ... WHAT ABOUT THE REALLY COOL MOUNTAIN LIONS? ... THE TIME JUST SEEMS TO FLY BY

March 6,  2005

WHEN COMMITTING A CRIME, PLAN AHEAD ... A LOGICAL ASSUMPTION ... OK, WE WON'T DO BUSINESS WITH THEM EITHER ... MR. PASSED AWAY IS NOT AMUSED ... AT LEAST THEY'RE GOOD FOR SOMETHING 

February 27,  2005

IT COULD HAVE BEEN A LOT WORSE ... WOULDN'T IT BE EASIER JUST GETTING A JOB? ... I'LL HAVE A POUND OF TUNA AND AN OUNCE OF YOUKNOWWHAT ... A LIKELY STORY ... HEY, STOP! WAIT! HOLD ON! 

February 20,  2005

HEY, YOU SMELL FAMILIAR ... YOU DON'T SCARE ME, COPPER, BLAM! ... THIS'LL STOP THEM ... SHE DIDN'T THINK IT THROUGH ... IT WAS FUN WHILE IT LASTED

February 13,  2005

OK, HE'S SWERVING; WAIT, HE'S WEAVING ... LUCKY FOR YOU ... THEY MUST HAVE HAD A GOOD LAWYER ... SHE JUST GOT SICK OF ME, I GUESS ... I GOTTA SAY, I LIKE HER CHANCES

February 6,  2005

WHAT COULD POSSIBLY GO WRONG? ... I FEEL PRETTY, OH SO PRETTY ... D'OH! ... PUTTING THE 'FIRE' IN FIREHOUSE ... SHE'S CRAZY, I TELL YA'!

January 30,  2005

UH SIR, YOU REALLY CAN'T GET AWAY ... GOOD, CLEAN, WHOLESOME FUN ... SOMETHING'S STARTING TO BOTHER ME ... CONSIDER THIS YOUR 'BEST OFFER' ... THE GIFT THAT KEEPS ON GIVING

January 23,  2005

WAS THAT HIS RIGHT OR MY RIGHT? ... HOME SWEET ALMA MATER ... OK KIDS, IT'S SHOWTIME! ... KANGAROO? I DIDN'T SEE ANY KANGAROO ... FASHION CONSCIOUS EVEN WHEN UNCONSCIOUS 

January 16,  2005

SO HE'S AN EXPERT ON THE SUBJECT ... WHAT GOOD IS IT IF YOU CAN'T BRAG? ... HOLD ON, I'M THE VICTIM HERE! ... NO CHILD LEFT BEHIND, BUT DRIVER WAS ... TOUCHDOWN! YES! BOOYAH!

January 9,  2005

LYING LITTLE BITCH ROAD ... OH HONEY, I'M HOME! ... QUICK, SOMEBODY CALL A COP! ... MONEY WELL SPENT ... OH YEAH? WHAT ARE YOU GONNA' DO TO ME?

January 2,  2005

WHAT'S THAT, A YULE LOG? ... DON'T YOU POINT THAT FINGER AT ME! CHOMP! ... WHO, ME? ... HEY, DON'T GO ON THE WARPATH OVER IT ... I GOT HIGH JUST COUNTING IT